Life Events & Experiences Affecting Self Worth & Value System

Aspect
Positive Experience
Negative Experience
Impact On Self Worth And Values
How to Challenge Negative Beliefs
Improving Self Worth
Assessing Realistic Self Worth
Successes & Failures
Overcoming a challenge, recognizing the role of effort and perseverance.
Repeated failures, especially when there's little support or focus is solely on the outcome.
Beliefs:
"I'm resilient, I can improve"
vs.
"I'm a failure, why bother trying?"
Value:
Growth, embracing challenges
vs.
Risk aversion, perfectionism
Reframe failure as experience. Ask, "What did I learn?"
Focus on your effort, not just the result.
Remind yourself: "Past failures aren't future predictors."
Celebrate even small successes.
Seek opportunities for manageable challenges to build confidence.
Prioritize learning over avoiding all mistakes.
What have I successfully overcome in the past?
Where have I shown persistence even when it was difficult?
Relationships
Healthy, supportive friendships/romantic partners.
Mutually respectful, loving, and encouraging.
Toxic relationships where there's criticism, control, or lack of emotional support.
Beliefs:
"I'm worthy of love and respect"
vs.
"I'm unlovable, I attract bad relationships"
Values:
Healthy connection, trust, setting boundaries
vs.
People-pleasing, tolerating mistreatment.
Identify patterns: Do I repeat unhealthy relationship dynamics?
Journal: "What do I need from a relationship?".
Learn about healthy boundaries and communicate your needs.
Cultivate supportive relationships outside the romantic context.
Practice self-compassion after unhealthy relationships end.
Seek therapy to heal past wounds that impact relationships.
What kind of people are supportive and bring out my best?
Do my choices reflect that I deserve healthy love?
Significant Life Transitions
Successful move to a new city, fulfilling career change. Support and resources are available.
Difficult transition (divorce, job loss) with little support or coping skills.
Beliefs:
"I'm adaptable, I can handle change"
vs.
"I can't cope, life's always hard for me"
Values:
Resilience, seeking support
vs.
Helplessness, self-isolation.
Remind yourself of past transitions you've navigated.
Focus on what you can control within the change.
Challenge "all or nothing" thinking: Is this transition universally bad?
Learn coping mechanisms for stressful times.
Ask for help & emotional support.
Seek opportunities for small wins and normalcy within the change.
Where have I shown adaptability in the past?
What healthy coping mechanisms have served me before?